when the melancholic meets the sanguine

Finished “The New Spirit-controlled Woman” by Beverly this week, only to affirm myself a “Megan Melancholic”. The experience of reading this book is like reading a women’s magazine, and I almost grimaced at the last few chapters on sex. Anyway, there is some truth in this book though, especially when it frames up the book with proverbs 30: 11-15, the four main personalities 11 "There are those who curse their fathers and do not bless their mothers; those who are pure in their own eyes, and yet are not cleansed of their filth; those whose eyes are ever so haughty, whose glances are so disdainful, those whose teeth are swords, and whose jaws are set with knives, to devour the poor from the earth,the needy from among mankind. There are just too many times I wish to flog myself incessantly for being so smitten by the sanguines.

The first week in my new school has been acutely dramatic, not much having a talent for happiness. But thank God so much for the saving graces of people around who encourage me greatly with their fine presence and resonant voices of eloquence. Amidst unsettling anecdotes, I yearn the exacting memory of my time in twss be marked with kindness in good sense. Right now, things around just seem odd to me, but everything incalculably alive in the mind. And such prosaic happiness which one deems is natural in a new environment has found in my heart harder to be rationalized and justified. If I am enamored of this new season in my life, then I wish that the pressures will not rend my soul or bald my head precociously. The mind and heart have been running wild in its neck breaking speed and God must place a tight rein on them before I get buoyed up in the platter of sinful pleasures. The most important of it all is that I must keep close to Him, and I will find. I am positive that the restraints on myself now will make a greater woman in me. So Lord, when the heart is prone to wander, make my weaknesses into your strengths to run this race of immense difficulty. If I have ever been finding for that someone who is incurably romantic in taking the lead for my life, it must be you.