this is a lousy week. things i have planned in my heart to do, i didnt get to do them. i want to eat at pasta mania, i want to drink a cuppa at coffee club, i want to rant, i do want to cry. staying home the entire day is a dull reclusive feeling especially when the jitters and anxieties of the pending exams keep boiling. and the life of a reader and a writer is solitary; really lonely. i am drained of talking to myself. i am entrenched in my nonsensical fixated thoughts. my writings become an expression of my vexation with my own frustrations. war declares itself in the hibernating mood of the super ego and id. i feel that one tip off the shore i will land in the myriad sea of craziness, my feet keep getting hooked onto shackles. jesus becomes my ever closest friend in this season. he is my big soulmate. in the void of day, i feel that the world has left me kind of far. my friendships become virtual, my love is gone, i am eager-eyed towards dusk. no, i'm breathing dust. is this all what exams is all about?
where is the fresh air?
Open my eyes that I may see wonderful things in your law. -- Psalm 119:18
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